Sunday, May 20, 2012

Pause.

Nearly three months since my last post. 

You could say I'm in limbo.  No real place to call home.  Still struggling to get clarity on what I want and what is right for me.  I miss my home immensely but I guess you can make anywhere a home.

Having said that, the last three months have brought about some further changes.  I managed to land myself a new job, which I've now been posted in for three weeks.  I'm exhausted from training course after training course... but ultimately, I think this will be a really challenging and interesting job that I can really develop into.  Plus, despite Teresa May's best efforts, my job "should" be secure for at least two years.  I think that's as secure as a job is going to get under this government. Score. What's not so good is the fact that moving away from some good friends at my old work location is making me feel even more isolated.  My friends provided me with the laughs, alcohol and chats that were keeping me going... and now I've moved away from them too.  I know my new team will fill that gap eventually, but that takes time, and right now, having something solid, continuous and stable was such a welcome thing. 

Because of my new job I've had to ditch my rail commuter pass, and get myself a car.  He's a matt black Fiat 500 called Franko, and he's awesome.  He has blue stripes and although he's not too fast, he turns heads and makes an impression.  I love seeing people walk passed him in the carpark and comment on how awesome his paint job is.  :-) He makes me smile. And I need that at the moment.
I have to say I am NOT liking driving to work.  I miss the train journey; the space to snooze, read, spy, people watch, listen to my mp3 player and lose myself for a while, absolve myself of the responsibility of transporting myself from one place to another... now I have to sit in the same position for 30 boring minutes, a slave to a set posture and a radio station.  It's restrictive.  However, I'm not unaware of the advantages- no waiting around, no 15 minute walk in the freezing rain before and after my journey, being able to wear heels to work! And of course, showing the world Franko.

My little neice is due in 9 days time.  Unfortunately seeing as she will be born and living in Japan, you could say my Auntie skills won't be particularly well utilised, but it's exciting nonetheless. 

I spent yesterday painting a friend's nursery wall which winded up looking pretty awesome... it was nice to be around paint again.  I have some creative projects on the horizon, which means I also need to get my shit together and sort out accomodation so that I can work on these projects effectively.  I have two cake toppers to do for August, and some band artwork to work on too so I'm really looking forward to "finding myself" again by immersing myself in creative practice again.

These things are good for me.  I need these things.