You know what I really really really hate at the moment???
Okay you're right... it could be any number of things... but what I really really really really REALLY hate right now, is hating something that I can't change, something all together quite pointless and frustratingly out of my control. And that is- not knowing.
I don't care that I don't know "stuff" about this or that ... but I hate not knowing what to do for myself, hate not knowing wether I'm making the right decision, if what I'm doing is 'right'. Is there a right? Do I actually know what to do and something is holding me back? Do I HAVE an answer that I've ignored, or do I genuinely not know? Is that a cop out? If so, why? Have I thought too much? Not enough?
I know every one gets this from time to time, and there's no use blathering and umming and aahing and thinking over and over until you're sick to death of the whole situation; I know that there are always consequences and the grass is always greener on the other side, I know about biting the bullet, and grabbing the bull by the horns, I also know about seizing the day and making the most of a bad situation. I know alot of stuff actually, I know all sorts.. I know ME better than anyone else in this world... But I still Don't. Know. And it's the plain, boring fact that I CAN'T know what will happen that is bothering me so much.
Random, vague, nonesense to you... thought stream to me.
know. know. know. know. no.
Maybe that's the answer.
3 comments:
"One never goes so far as when one doesn't know where one is going." - Goethe
Sorry to fling dead German authors on you, but the fact is... you DO know what you want. You just don't know how you're going to get there.
My answer is, wait and see. That's the fun part...
Useless addition probably, but...
Knowing too much totally sucks! Just imagine knowing where to go, how to get there and anything that will happen in between, no where's the fun in that? So [place a whole bunch of cliches here].. and just go on, have doubts, fuck up and do great things, whatever; surprise yourself!
argh... "wait and see".. I enjoyed the freedom of this for about a month and now I'm tired of it.
I'm okay having the doubts, I'm okay with not knowing "stuff"... what I'm not okay with is not knowing who someone is and wether they're going to mess up again.
:(
Thanks for your words though guys...
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