Slow Progress...

Well, The boards are all painted, so are the plinths, the floor is scrubbed and now I just have to prepare all my actual work for displaying next week. I've got the doctors tomorrow about my chest pains too, though I'm pretty sure it's going to be a case of check my BP, listen to my heart, tell me I'm stressed, offer me rubbish tablets which I'll refuse, and then I'll be on my way and wondering why I wasted my time. But still, on the off chance they may actually investigate enough to discover something, I guess it's worth it, just in case.

OOOooooooh!!! My postcards and business cards arrived today! I'm really pleased with them... It's so strange seeing my name followed by : Illustrator though. Woah.

Niall's final year project is just printing off on my supa-dupa printer ... reams and reams (I think there's about 90 odd pages) of funny squiggles on graphs, strange charts and funny big words. I stand by the fact that my work is SO much more interesting.

Speaking of which, I've been completely disheartened by my course again this week. While painting my exhibition space, I noticed that I have such a dark corner; there's hardly any natural light. The room in general is a complete tip thanks to the messy graphics students in there who thought it necessary to trash the room with rubbish, scribble on all the walls put sticky fixers all over the place which are a total bastard to get off again. I mean, really, putting their work up was bad enough. (*evil grin*) The whole room is crap and compared to the other two I don't think it's good enough. It's stuck right at the end of the corridoor and I know people will assume that the first two rooms are the whole exhibition, leaving a whole load of work overlooked. It's typical of my course. Andy's excuse was that we've been allocated spaces according to what looks best for the show... does that mean the best work gets the best spaces? Yes. Does that mean that Andy's favorites get the perfect spots? Yes. Does that mean that everyone who's already on a first gets the privilege of a perfect spot while the rest of us have to make do with crappy spaces, making our work look even less appealing???? Bollocks to that. Along with this, I have the distinct feeling that I'm only going to attain a 2:2, which without sounding big-headed, doesn't reflect how much work I've done in the last three years; three years that have been really hard, sometimes completely miserable, with constant ridicule from tutors and constant pressure to do better next time. It takes alot for me to be pleased with my work (you wonder why?), but I have enough respect for it to say that it, or at least the effort I've put in, is worth more than a frigging 2:2. I don't mean to sound snobby about this, I don't. A 2:2 is perfectly respectable, as is any degree, but when you've been led to believe that you can get so high, then get marked down with no explanation, it plain sucks ass. It makes a complete mockery of the so-called marking scheme, or module requirements whatever they call them, because at the end of the day if Andy likes it best, you'll be okay. To hell with effort. I was led to believe I'd done enough to meet those requirements, but if they can be twisted to suit people who blatantly haven't followed them then why fucking bother having them in the first place??

On my course... THIS is worth a higher grade than my work. That's crap. Unfair and crap. Fair do's she's worked hard... fine give her a first, but for god's sake follow it up with the same logic for everyone else. If that can get a first, mine bloody can too.

I can't wait to get away from the complete farce that is my course.

Bitterness, angst and general ranting over for today... I'm off to admire my business cards again.