I will be trying a series of new profile pics over next week to see which one I like best... so comment if you will on which I should stick with. But don't be mean please. Yeah Dave that means YOU too.
It's wierd how things can affect how you view yourself. I've frequently had my ego smashed to pieces by some pretty harsh comments and some complete idiots too, but these days I can swing so quickly from feeling... okayish about how I look, or at least not really thinking about it (normally when I'm indoors away from people... hmm this isn't sounding good..) to totally hating what I look like and getting real low. Niall has done so much to help me feel good about myself and I love him for it, I know I'm a better person for it but it's still not enough to stop the nasty things in my head kicking in every day. I just wish my head wasn't scarred with these awful comments and jibes about my physical appearance. No matter how much you try and ignore them, I seem to carry them around with me like they're permanantly burned into my head. Nothing makes these come alive more than feeling jealous of an attractive person; or some guys oggling a perfect lady; or how you hardly find any not-so-attractive women on tv or film; or some random person looking at me and going "ooh you're soo thin... ", why thanks for telling me, I wasn't aware of that; or some fat woman on tv saying how ugly thin women are and how we look unnatural, boyish and not beautiful, no beautiful is for "real women" apparently... now I know this is a response to years of thin being 'in', but turning it on its head and slagging off every skinny girl in sight with some godamn spiteful and awful comments is as fucked up as the other thing was.
Boo. :(
Anyways enough of that... apparantly Niall thinks I'm pretty so that's something. :)
I need a new band. I need that feeling I got when I first heard BoyHitsCar and was totally blown away. I want my head to explode again and find something new and distinctive that smacks me in the face and drenches me with relief from this godamn band-drought.
Gimme some music dammit!!!
5 comments:
Howdy Slink.
You posted a comment on my blog, saying you miss Brum.
Arrrr, Brum is indeed aprettypretty cool.
I looked over your interests; Boyhitscar, I saw them in Glasgow a few years back, they were supporting Stone Temple Pilots - was a way cool gig. Live music fills spaces in my mind.
Looked over the work on your site too; You have a very nice style. The traditional work is busy but still¿?
The mixed media piece with the little fella inside what seems to be a lettuce or large brussel sprout (no offence intended) haunts me a little. He has a truly harrowing look on his face, or maybe it's just the angle!
Anyhoo, keep well, and keep up the blog.
hehe hey thanks mr flakester. The work on there is a little out of date but thanks much the same. And wow... you saw boy hits car, you lucky man. I'm jealous.
thought id reply to what u left on my weblog! its true that rataouie is a menacing colour! think ill stick to marmite sarnies! that stuffs a saviour in india!!! hope i dont run out too soon though!
Hahahaha Slink!!! :Þ
Genetic splice type experiments?? No, none. Well, not of late.
Aye, 'tis a weird thing this, I'm still laughing about it and grinning - with one less tooth! :Þ
Another weird thing: I have a personal physician and advisor that I mention in my blog from time to time whose name happens to be Dr Slinky McVelvet! (Inventor of the word "mellifluous"). Of no consequence, just a bit odd.
Have a goodun.
Konbanwa Imoto chan
You want a new Band.
Check out SA. they might be called Samurai Attack in England though. They are amazing old school punk, and are pretty famous in Japan with underground punks. look for Get Up Warriors and Stay Strong. Whats more, Ive met them, got drunk with them twice and moshed for my life at their concert.
Your brother still ROCKS. damn it.
Oh yeah nice work on Als CD. Tell him he needs to get his Lambswool power perm shorn off. Now.
Ja matte.
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