Kill

I hate crap days. Even worse are the days that squeeze as much crappness into a small space of time as possible. It's not even eleven yet and my day sucks ass.

I get up late on the only day I have to be in college early to get an appointment to see my tutor. I have to wait what seems like ages for housemates to finish in the bathroom, then leg it into college with my big basket of work. I see a magpie. I hate magpies, bastards. I get into college to find all the appointment times booked up until 2.00!!! *&?!@#!!! So with nothing to do, I face the choice of sitting on my arse in the studio or sitting on my arse in my room. Next, we have a fire drill. Then I find one of the other model makers on my course has won a place in the dimensional salon competition in New York. Without sounding like a big head, I happen to think my work's alot more original than hers. I like her work, but it's somewhat bland and none of it is contextualised. This pisses me off greatly as I've strived to do the best in my work and make it look different and interesting, then some dullard with all the creative flair of a rotting sprout comes along and wins something prestigous for playing it safe. Well fuck that. She even nicked my eyelash idea.

So now I have three hours to kill ( KILL KILL KILL) before I go in to see Andy and have him stare nonchalantly at my work, not give me a hint of opinion as to wether he likes it or not, then set me a new project to 'challenge' me.

I hope it involves poison.

A Perfect Rock Night

Here's my perfect rock night play list:

Kryptonite- Three Doors Down
Spoonman- Soundgarden
Golgotha Tenement Blues- Machines Of Loving Grace
Awaken- Disturbed
Licking Cream- Sevendust
Blackout- Hed (PE)
Local God- Everclear
La Ultima Hora- Breed 77
Anthem For The Year 2000- Silverchair
Smells Like Teen Spirit- Nirvana
Ace Of Spades- Motorhead
Epic/Ashes to Ashes- Faith No More
Where Is My Mind- Pixies/Placebo
Pet/Judith- A Perfect Circle
Starfuckers- Nine Inch Nails
Psycho- System Of A Down
As I Watch The Sun Fuck The Ocean- Boy Hits Car
Stinkfist- Tool
Bullet In The Head- Rage Against The Machine
My Last Serenade- Killswitch Engage
Here To Stay- Korn
Passenger/Change- Deftones
Halo- Soil
Down With The Sickness- Disturbed
Smack My Bitch Up- Prodigy
Chop Suey!- System Of A Down
I Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me- Marilyn Manson
Closer- Nine Inch Nails
Drunken Lullabies- Flogging Molly



I got Bored.

Woob

It was one of those mornings where you don't want to get in the shower because the bathroom is freezing and the second between taking off your dressing gown and actually getting in the shower seems like an eternity. Then, as soon as you're in, you don't want to get out. Boo for cold bathrooms. The psycho shower curtain seems to be settling slightly, it only tried to smother me once before I got it to stick against the wall.

I've finished all my models though some are in need of a few tiny details before I head off to Nottingham to photograph them. It' s left me a bit high and dry this weekend so Ive made a start on making a few Christmas pressies.

Act of Stupidity of the day goes to Niall who I found standing in the bathroom for ages pouring a refill bottle of handwash into the empty one. Why didn't he just take off the plungy top thing and stick it in the new one, I hear you ask? Because he's Irish. That's why.

Rock night was cool last thursday. For a change I wore my "Burton-esque" stripey trousers, with a waist-clincher and halter neck. Woob! The music was a bit punky for a few hours but it got alot better towards the end of the night with some of my favorites being played. :) Since then I've been working two days solid.

Mmmmmm cheese toasties....

How to be a domestic idiot

I planned to go work in the studio for a few hours this morning but I slept in too late (again) but I've been really busy since I got up. I went straight into town to shop for materials and also got a few christmas pressies in the process. woohoo. or boohoo if you're my bank account. I bought a strange sandwich to eat when I got home. Now I get really busy... Firstly I sculpted the shape of my next piece of work, 'Pride'. Whilst waiting for the world's slowest oven to heat up, I loaded the washing machine with my laundry and set it going, meanwhile I had the tap running for filling up the wash bowl to do some much needed washing up. Started washing up, after a few minutes I put my work into the oven to bake the clay and even remembered to set the timer. Carried on washing up, and continued to wash up the whole houses stuff that'd been left for god knows how long. I did at this point make quite a severe error... I managed to drop a plate face down into the washing up bowl creating this tsunami of bubbles and smelly water which cascaded down me, half the kitchen carpet and all the cupboards. Bugger. I could have drowned. It reminded me of the Great Ribena Explosion of 2002 when I dropped a bottle of ribena and it landed standing up, forcing the contents into the air and over pretty much the whole of our tiny halls kitchen. There was no time to hide, I saw the bottle slip and then I just saw purple. Everywhere. I stood there in shock for a few seconds with ribena on my face, in my hair, on my clothes, on the floor, the cupboards, it was even on my eyelids. I thought I would be blinded. Nevertheless, I survived. Anyway... back to me being a domesticated person....By the time I'd cleaned up the mess and had a nice patch of water all over my trousers, my work had cooked and I took it out the oven to cool. Whilst it cooled I dried some pots, put them away, then cleaned all the surfaces and the sink. God, I'm good.

Went to the pub on tuesday to meet some of Niall's engineering buddies. The conversation wasn't as dull as I expected, it wasn't all spongioboringial dynamics, and oogliobotronics or whatever. They were nice enough guys and I had a good night. Mark was a very drunken monkey that night and we had a debate about boobies.

Commited a slight sin in town today. I had to buy a Donny Osmond calendar for my mom's friend for xmas, as mom couldn't find one anywhere. I felt dirty.

Spider Update

It turns out the potentially dead spider on the bathroom floor was in fact a rather hairy twig stuck to a small stone.

You can't be too careful these days.

Fat Ice

Big news first.... Housemate Dave has actually done his washing up.

Thursday night was wicked, though I can't seem to remember much about it. It was very cold though. Then on friday I went home with Niall. Getting the train(s) back was a bit of a nightmare and cost me about £10. We went to see 'The Grudge' when we eventually got there. It wasn't the bad rip off of 'The Ring', like I expected and it wasn't overly americanised with too many pouting, so called 'attractive' people. It had some pretty striking images in it that can really get inside your head. I was scared. But I liked it. I don't want to see it again though. Ever.

Saturday we went into good ol' brum shopping. Cult is becoming even more trendy-ized every day and I hate it because it used to be a bloody good place. But hope remained in the form of The Oasis. Aaaaah I miss The Oasis. I didn't buy anything though, for two reasons... a) I couldn't find much I liked and when I could it wasn't in my size (bloody typical) and b) I haven't got any money. I did find a cool dress that was black and short with this furry black stuff round the top but it was too big. I was a bit all over the place that day and kept feeling really teary over things so I wasn't in the best mood to discover that being a size 8 makes you a freak to soceity and they refuse to stock clothes for 'the skinny abnormal' people. Get lost. I get a little bit pissed off at the amount of hypocritical larger people who make themselves feel better by slagging off small people. They moan about how they were picked on and taunted for being overweight, then do the same to smaller sized people. It seems the way to stop large people feeling outed by soceity is to simply make soceity think badly of anyone who is thin and that if they are they obviously have an eating disorder because no one can be naturally thin.....!!! Yes, nowadays, "real" women have curves and can be deemed beautiful yet if you're below a size 10, you're merely a freak with a body like a pre-pubescent boy. You can't solve one problem by just making others feel ugly. That's totally fucked up. But that's another day's rant I feel...

I did get Niall's christmas pressie in Brum. I didn't realise how big it was however and spent alot of time covering it with my scarf over the enormous Selfridges bag to cover it up and stop him seeing it. Anyways, in the evening we went to see 'The Incredibles'. It was well animated and had a decent enough storyline but it's not one of pixar's best.

Today, had a nice sunday roast with the family. And now i'm back at uni with lots of work to do. Boo. Oh and Jon wants me to write more nice things about him so here goes... Jon is a nice man.

There.

Dead Spider

I think there's a dead spider in our bathroom. I say I think because I'm not entirely sure it's fully dead. I mean it's only got four rather squashed and crumpled legs and it hasn't moved for a whole day, but I'm still not convinced. It might be pretending. Spiders are the kind of evil bastards who would pretend to be dead when they're not. Don't get me wrong, I prefer it this way than scuttling around but there's still something about it that's making me feel tingly and sick when I see it. And I can't get rid of it either. Not without veeery large boots on. Just in case. I looked at it (from a short distance just in case) for ages, trying to work out where it's head was but I couldn't tell. I don't care what anyone says they're evil. Evil. They can think you know. I saw one once. I saw one actually stop in front of a closed door and slowly lower itself to fit under. It stopped. It stopped to think about it. Clever. And that's why they're evil. They fly too. They fly through the air even though there's no web there. They know. And they know who hates them; they know who the weak ones are.

The only good thing about them is that they kill the males after mating. Good idea that.

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

After my 'inspiration' trip on erm... yeh saturday, I set to work on the first in my project series today, Sloth. I'm illustrating the seven deadly sins cocktails from the pit, and I must say Mr Sloth is the cutest little character I have made. :) And it only took me an afternoon.

On Sunday I spent all day working on my Critical report so it's all up to date, PLUS I've been doing plenty of research, emailing illustrators and getting some nice interesting replies. It's good to know there's some genuinely nice people out there willing to help others out. I also bought two books today. I can't really afford them but I think they'll be invaluable to my work.

Studio tomorrow, to see tutor Andy then into town to get some materials on a budget.

Man, I'm a hard worker.

Freak Show

Bright lights, burger van smells, screaming, those frightening carousels with the horses with huge nostrils next to great big chickens, and endless amounts of chavs. The fair's on in town.

I got a red snake and a nemo balloon. :) Which i think i hit a kid in the face with.

Before that though, I was in Nottingham trying to get inspiration for my new project. This 'inspiration' came in the form of two cocktails and lots of "I can't do this godamn work". I did get a few ideas in the end though.

I've been quite shocked at the amount of people not wearing poppys. Thats not to say they haven't contributed of course but it doesn't take a great deal of effort just to show your support. Also, dumass idiots on packed trains who decide their shopping bags deserve a seat more than the tired people standing in the aisles, should go to hell (or just a train in rush hour)and be made to stand on pins for twenty days with no food.

Raah.

Great Big Baggy Rants

I have furry throat syndrome from last night. It was a wicked night last night, some really decent tunes were played and my good old Motorhead top got an outing again. I did get really really sleepy towards the end though. Before we left Niall finally managed to find some Kahlua to successfully make the cocktail Sloth from the pit. It was yummy although it was a funny colour. I’ve had a nice lie in since I’m not going into the studio today. I actually went in for all of five minutes yesterday and everyone had gone home, so I figured I was just as well working from home. I was wrong because I did nothing all day. Ha.

I’ve had two big rants all ready this morning. Firstly… *&$!ing Jamie Cullum. This guy is a nonce. He’s bland and annoying, his voice sucks, his useless “music” sounds samey and dull, he wrecks perfectly decent, if not brilliant songs, and if I ever see him I’ll stuff piano keys into his eyes and tie the strings around parts of his body I’d rather not mention. In terms of say, Suddam Hussain, he’s not a bad guy, but he annoys me to the brink of me feeling physically sick every time I hear his name. Some songs should remain sacrosanct; particularly Radiohead songs… and he dared to cover ‘High and Dry’. Other songs he’s ruined include songs by Jeff Buckley, and they aren’t even half decent versions. He just sings bits more slowly than normal, speeds up and slows down again, then howls a bit and wobbles around like a complete tosspot. He just sucks.

Do us all a favour and sod off.

Then I had a go at smokers. There’s all this stuff about bringing in a ban on smoking in public placed and quite frankly I’m all for it. It was great to go round bars in New York without coming out smelling like a charred lung. I choose not to smoke. I choose NOT to inhale and put these chemicals into my body. If you want to smoke, it’s your choice, but don’t force me to do the same. Smokers can moan and whinge about their rights or whatever, fair do’s, you have the right to poison yourselves… just don’t do it to me. Get over it. Oh and pubs… having a no smoking area is pretty godamn useless when you have to wander through all the smokers to get there. Dumasses.

On a lighter, less toxic note… my tutorial went ok. However, I did loooads of work for it only to have my tutor hardly look at it and then change my idea into something else. Ah well. I did what he said, and it looks pretty good. He also liked the idea for my new project and gave me the go ahead to start it. On the downside, he said he wants me to try a ‘girly’ project with pink and fluff and stuff. This scares me somewhat. But it may be useful and a good challenge.

Oh, lastly I had a dream the other night where Arnold Schwarzenegger turned into this huge bat-like creature with a shrunken head, inside out skin and great big bat wings. He then proceeded to rip his wife into tiny little bits, like tagliatelle pasta.

my rooms a mess

The best thing about staying in all day is that i don't spend any money. There was no point going into the studio today because tutorials are on. I did loads of work yesterday, and hopefully i can finish up this project soon and move on to one with more scope. I haven't stepped out of doors all day which means i won't sleep because i've had no fresh air, but does mean i've done a decent amount of work and not spent stupid amounts of money on random things or food.

I miss my buddy mark who i haven't seen in about a week. I really need a good night out soon, i think a night out at Rock City is in order soon. Or even better, a trip home to go to the gallows and edwards. I miss them too.

Since i've been stuck in my room all day i haven't even seen anything wierd. Booo.

Tutorial with Andy tomorrow... serious discussion about the quality (or lack of) in my work. :S

Sucky Post

I really haven't done that much so this posts going to suck.

Rock night was cool on thursday, had a really good night and finally stayed 'till the end for a change. The music was better than the usual stuff so it proved to be a wicked night. Though i did keep telling Jonjon to "read about the 'shrooms". He also said that South Park was better than me. I thought that was harsh. At least i have a nose. Friday, I was really good and did loads of work. Saturday I had to pop into town to get some material for the underneath of the mushroom i'm making as my next piece of work. In the evening, we ate pizza and watched 'Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind', which i thought was brilliantly done. It's co directed by Michel Gondry and that guy is just a genius; he uses these amazing layers of imagery and narrative. Today i went to Notty to see the family and eat lots of food. My Grandma and Grandad gave me £50 to "help me out" bless em. It's much MUCH appreciated at the moment. :)

As for the Perfect Circle cd, I must say it's a slight disappointment. I think it's because it's a response to all the politics going on, and although it says alot about a perfect circles beliefs, its maybe not their true musical selves. It seems rushed, and there's not as much beauty in the songs as the previous albums. They just don't have heart as it's not coming directly from the core of the band. Don't get me wrong, songs like 'Passive' and even 'Imagine' have a good sound to them, but the whole album is more of an 'essence' of a perfect circle rather than their true form I felt. I like it, but it's a bit of a let down from the usual near perfect quality of sound, rythmn and lyrical genius that makes this band special.

Right, back to the mushroom.

Another reason i don't like mushrooms...

mother of all mushrooms


Other than their wierd texture and funny taste, this picture worries me.

I think they're trying to take over. One day... mushrooms will take over the world.

Where is my mind?

I've had one of those days where you forget about a million things. It all started when i forgot to wake up at the right time, however i still managed to get up and into the studio for about half ten which wasn't bad. I did forget to take out my rubbish though. I worked in the studio for a bit then realised i'd forgotton some paint and my sewing box, so i went home after a bite to eat to get some more bits and bobs. On returning to the studio, i sat down, painted a bit then cut some material and got out a needle to thread it together and... hmm no thread. At this point i decided i'd give up trying to work in there and go home, or rather... go into town to buy Shrek 2. But oooh no, the forgetfulness didn't stop there... i realised i left my new as-of-yet-unbroken umbrella in the studio, i also realised i'd left my looney toons toy tokens for boots in my room, so i made niall run back for them before we got to far. About five minutes after that, i remembered i had some letters to post but i'd left them at home.

I had a mini spree in town. I bought Shrek 2, and got my free looney toons toy from boots. (They say free... but it was one token for every £5, and you needed ten tokens. Sadly, i buy alot from boots, and even more sadly... i wanted a looney toons toy). I'd been planning to get Daffy Duck but the beaks were all sqaushed and he looked like some sort of psycho so i plumped for Tweety Pie instead. I also bought the new A Perfect Circle album 'Emotive'. I'm listening to it now. I expect it will be ace, as is more or less everything they've done so far. Stay tuned for a review when i've listened to it through fully. Man, I love that band

Niall also got me 'Mechanical Animals' which i've been meaning to get for some years now, and he got me these funky gloves that go right up my arm, with buttons all the way up the sides. They're cool. :) We also stocked up on Baileys, Amaretto and Vodka so we can start trying to make the Sloth cocktail soon. God, i miss it. It's the best cocktail i've ever tried and i can get through a pitcher of it like theres no tomorrow. Easily. All we need now is Kahlua, cream and chocolate sauce, nowhere seemed to sell Kahlua. And even if we don't get it right first time, the experimenting will be fun.

Ooh, also, i think things are sorted with Dave. He spoke to me this morning and said he'd sent me an email but i haven't got it... dumb hotmail. But he said he doesn't hate me and that we're being silly. I bought him some choccies to say sorry. I hope he likes them and i hope things will go back to normal. :)

This is a much longer post than i thought it was going to be.

Feeling ... Blurgh

Walking through town in a bright wed rig, black horns, stockings and suspenders and black fairy wings, with Hellboy, a number of Zombies, a gangster, Captain Barbosa, a gladiator and Obi Wan... just a typical saturday night out in town or Mark's house's Halloween party? Yeah the party. It was cool, despite ending up in Vice Versa- ew. Everyone looked great though and it was good fun dressing up. Mark looked totally fab all painted up as Hellboy. In fact everyone looked cool.

I'm feeling really ... just below average at the moment and it sucks. Haven't done much the last two days. Sunday i caught up on some much needed sleep. Things still aren't any better with Dave. We're still not talking, i hate it, but i think i'm out my depth when it comes to solving this one. I don't think he's interested. Makes me want to cry.

On the plus side, I spoke to my good ol' pal Adam today, up in leeds. He says he has a Muse-related pressie for me but he won't tell me what it is!! Needless to say i'm really intrigued...

Studio tomorrow. Urgh.