Buckle Up.

What. A. Week.

Monday was my first day in my new job.  Talk about being thrown in at the deep end.  As is typical of my organisation I literally rocked up on my first day, nervous as hell and was handed some numbers and told to pretty much get on with it.  Fortunately there is another girl doing the same role who was equally as bewildered as I was.  When I was taken to my first meeting on Monday afternoon expecting to have prepared a report and be able to deliver it to the meeting, I pretty much felt like I'd made a massive mistake in leaving the comfort  and familiarity of my old team.  As it turned out, there had been a cock up and the meeting was actually scheduled for that morning so I managed to escape certain embarrassment by delivering to a meeting that I had NO idea about. 

Tuesday got worse, and I winded up emailing the Sgt who was overseeing the roll out of our jobs to different sectors to complain that we had effectively been left to do a job without any training or preparation.  It fell on deaf ears, and Tuesday night I got home and cried, wanting to re-apply for my old job.

However, I think the breakdown did me good and cleared my head a little.  Wednesday saw a slight improvement as I embraced the uncertainty and focussed on the good points of the role which include actually having just one job to focus on.  On Thursday I delivered to my first conference and the feedback was that I sounded professional and precise which was amazing considering how nervous I felt. 

I feel better about it... I think it will improve as I settle and feel more comfortable in the role.  I need a few more meetings under my belt to get me used to the way they work.  I know at some point there is going to be a confrontation due to the sensitive nature of the meeting, so that will be a new and challenging aspect to the role that I haven't experienced yet.  Can't say I'm looking forward to that aspect but it's part and parcel of the work and can only improve the skills I already have. 

The new job has been the sandwich filling nestled firmly between two large, soft and wonderfully tasty slices of awesomeness this week.  On Monday night I went to see Extreme, straight after work, and having had ZERO sleep.  Rock. AND. Roll.  Extreme's 90's hair metal classic album Pornograffiti is one of the albums of my childhood- and yes I am aware how inappropriate that sounds - however the music itself is amazing, cheesy as hell, but amazing-feel-good cheese which warms my soul.  I know every detail of the album inside out and one of my memories of it is playing it at my 7/8th birthday party much to the bemusement of my7/8 year old, flowery dress-adourned party invitees.  Awesome.  They were aging, but brilliant.  As a 25th anniversary tour of the album, they played the FULL thing in its entirety.  Nuno still looks FIT AS, despite approaching 50.  Brilliant, I honestly haven't felt as happy as I did when I was singing away to "Hole Hearted" and I pretty much think I was mesmerised at one point by Nuno's solo- skills. Unbelieveble.  And he makes it look so easy.

At the other end of the week - Friday night I went to see The Penguin Café Orchestra which again, is another childhood musical experience.  The music reminds me of my Dad, and brings back so many cherished and happy memories of sitting as a family in the lounge, chatting, laughing and listening to the music all together.  The concert was at The Lichfield Cathedral which couldn't have been a more acoustically perfect setting for the music.  It sounded beautiful and just made my soul feel content and relaxed and happy.  I'd seen them once before, and possibly preferred their first offering in terms of content, however I love how the guy who now runs the orchestra is the son of the original founding member, and he recalls how the music relates to his childhood from the time when I too remember first hearing it all.  The parallels are as wonderfully fitting to me as the music is to it's own individual themes and concepts. 

After such an emotionally charged and stressful week I've taken this weekend off any sculpture projects to recharge my batteries.  Saturday was spent catching up with my two besties, N and Markuus, at the Fuse festival in Lichfield which consisted of sitting in a field drinking strawberry cider in the sunshine and listening to a number of acoustic sets and some good old fashioned sea shanties.

Today I've come to Nottingham to see family as I've spent so many of the last few weekends working on sculptures and commissions that I've not seen my Grandparents in months.  Time is precious, and so I've ensured today is spent in their company.  A roast is being prepared, and I look forward to spending an hour or two round the dinner table listening to my Grandad recount old stories and tales from his past, many of which I've heard before... but that I love hearing again and again nonetheless.

:-) Happy.

Piggy.

Nine Inch Nails on Sunday night was, as expected, EPIC.  The gig was a more meaty than their Belfast gig last year.  It was less about playing the classics and crowd-pleasers and more about blowing minds.  If you were new to Nine Inch Nails (unlikely) I can imagine it was a bit of a baptism by fire.  It was unbelievable: perfect sound coupled with a blinding, awe-inspiring lighting performance and staging.  Favourites of the night were Disappointed, a brilliantly haunting version of Sanctified, The Great Destroyer (which is immense through decent earphones; practically hypnotic and made my heart race; gave me goosebumps live) and a superb Piggy.

 

 

 

I know I'm biased, because in my eyes (ears?) pretty much everything Trent Reznor touches turns to gold, however this music just feels like my insides; how my soul feels.  It's just fucking awesome. 

 

"Piggy"Hey pig,
Yeah you.

Hey pig, piggy, pig, pig, pig
All of my fears came true.
Black and blue and broken bones,
You left me here; I'm all alone.
My little piggy needed something new.

 Nothing can stop me now,
'Cause I don't care anymore.
Nothing can stop me now,
  'Cause I just don't care.

Hey pig,
Nothing's turning out the way I planned.
Hey pig,
There's a lot of things I hoped you could help me understand.
What am I supposed to do? I lost my shit because of you. 

 

Nothing can stop me now,
'Cause I don't care anymore.
Nothing can stop me now,
  'Cause I just don't care.

 

Oh god. Perfect.

Flop.

Aaaannd relax.

Three weeks.  THREE. WEEKS. of interviews is finally over.  Interview 3 went... ok.  After the last debacle I am finding it hard to judge.  But it was neither great nor terrible.  The weeks of prep work, studying, reading reams and reams of documents, guidance, policies and revising various law acts went COMPLETELY to waste as I wasn't asked ONCE what I did to prepare!!! Gutted.  Since I got out I've grown more and more aware of all the missed opportunities that I could have weaved all that prep work into my answers and pushed my hard work more... but really it would have been taking it all off track and not kept my answers focussed on the question... ugh it's hard. 

Either way, it's over now and all I can do is sit and wait. No actually... sit and RELAX and wait.

The last seven weeks have been ridiculous. Four of them running the office by myself, the latter three being taken up with interviews and squeezing in a cake topper for good measure. Stressy. But it's all over... this weekend I have FOUR days off with no interview prep, no cake topper to finish... it's ALL me time and I intend to enjoy EVERY minute of it.  I can also get back into the gym which I've been neglecting lately and man I can really tell.

To make it even more immense... Sunday is NINE INCH NAILS time. Holy. Shit.

Easter Weekend.

After finding out on Thursday that I had managed to get two interviews for two out of the three job applications I'd submitted, I broke up for the bank holiday weekend with a mix of excitement and mild panic that I wouldn't have time to prepare for my first one which was scheduled for Wednesday (today!).

However, the weekend was upon me, and after spending Friday catching up with chores and making some preparation notes, Saturday brought far more interesting times.  It was my first BTCC weekend of the season, with the tournament coming to Donington Park.

It will always remain "my" track, my local, my home from home and somewhere I simply love to be. 

Saturday was mainly dry and we found a good seating area on some rock formed steps down at the bottom of Craner curves.  We stocked up on doughnuts and hot drinks from the obligatory vans as we watched qualifying rounds for all the formulas who would be racing the following day.

It was so good to be back there again; the familiar sights sounds and smells seeping back under my skin. 

It was a bit cold and windy at times and I left swearing that on our return the following day I would layer up!

We left early in order to get back in time for my little sister V's birthday meal.  The family gathered at Miller and Carter for a slap up tasty steak meal.  I sadly couldn't manage a starter, main AND pudding so I opted for a rather tasty After Eight mint cocktail as my desert. DEEELISH.

On Sunday morning, we set off early for another day's racing.  I went fully prepared with two vest tops, two jumpers, a fleece and my H2NO rain coat. It was a good job because the mother of all downpours occurred as soon as we got out the car.  Along with another 100 racing fans we all tried to squeeze into the diner café and under the big parasols outside to stay out of the wet.  Our hopes of a comfortable days racing faded as it got heavier and heavier.  We wouldn't be leaving early today, and as we had tickets for the BTCC After Party! So staying dry was a priority! Fortunately we managed to stay dry during the downpour and once it trailed off, we drifted down to find a suitable perch for the days races.  Showers came and went throughout the day, but this lead to some pretty interesting and action packed races! :-) We had a second downpour in the afternoon, which V and I just hunkered down on our rock step seats and covered ourselves in our brolly, managing to avoid a soaking.


My trusty waterproof held out and the best racing was at towards the end of the afternoon with some brilliant racing and manoeuvres. We moved away from our sheltered rock steps and headed to the first corner for the final race of the day, and it was well worth the wind and cold there.  V took some brilliant photographs of the action.

The best of the weekend was still to come as after the racing finished we headed straight to the BTCC After Party!

After a VERY disappointing turkey and stuffing bap from one of the vintage themed food vans, we took our place near the stage, sneaking into the VIP area at the request of the first band- Ferris.  They played an average set, but were pretty uninspiring.  Following them was Toploader who played a fairly decent set but the sound quality was awful.  There was NO vocal sound for the front of the stage, so while the rest of the music could be heard, the vocals sounded muffly like Peter Kay's DJ.  The band and sound guys were informed by two slightly crazy people stood next to me (more on these later) but the sound issue remained throughout the whole set.  They played the only two songs I actually knew which was Achilles Heel and Dancing In The Moonlight which is one of very few songs that actually incite physical repulsion and hatred in me.  It's an AWFUL song. On every level.  But I endured it... and all for the headline act... REEF.

I have loved Reef since my teens when they were big throughout the Britpop years and they TOTALLY lived up to expectation.  To my (and the crazy fans next to me's) relief the sound was fixed as Reef brought with them, their own sound engineer.  It turned out the crazy fans next to me were SO crazy that they knew the band.  I say knew, as in they have clearly stalked them from day one and appear at all of their gigs.  They'd already travelled from Southampton for this gig because it was the guitarist's last ever show. 

Reef were incredible.  After the previous two distinctly average bands, they completely took over the room.  Gary Stringer looked EXACTLY as he did from the early reef days and sounded amazing.  Being so close to the stage he smiled and crouched right in front of me for photographs; and just owned the stage like a pro. It was brilliant. I sang away to my hearts content, which Gary seemed to appreciate giving me a lovely big smile half way through Yer Old.  He's still fit as. Amazing.

I know it was amazing... as I am still thinking about it days later.  If that isn't a sign of a good gig I don't know what is.  Speaking of gigs... I haven't blogged about my big news yet.  *Mental Note to blog about that tomorrow *.

Monday was spent in the park doing some more interview prep before returning back to work on Tuesday.  My interview was today, and after spending a few days feeling completely under prepared I think it went okay.  It was a bit short, felt a bit rushed by the interviewers at times but I think this was because they had a lot of applicants to get through.  By and large it was okay... I don't think I've ever come out of an interview thinking I said EVERYTHING I needed to, but generally I think they got the message that I had the skills for the role, and they made some comments suggesting that I would be considered for a post. Time will tell.  I have another interview to prepare for next week so after a night off I'll get back on the studying. I've been back to the gym tonight for the first time in about two weeks due to me being ill and then busy and then lazy. Must get back on it!!! I'm also half way through a wedding topper commission which I need to finish in the next couple of weeks! eek... If only I had more hours in the day!

Christmas Eve Eve; 2013 Reflections

I'm sitting in my slippers, watching A Christmas Carol on TV.  It's Christmas Eve Eve and I finished work today for the rest of the week. 

It's normally this time of the year when I'm doing a review of the year and compiling some New Years Resolutions, but I'm feeling a distinct lack of energy to do either. Plus, I'm not sure summarising my year will be all that eventful this time!

However... now I think back...

Things I have lost: 

Some friends. Not in a physical sense, they're alive and well.  People change, people move on and some people you realise really aren't worth your time and energy. Those who mean a lot to me, remain, however. Even if I don't see them as much as I would like. Thank you for your continued friendship to Mrs P, Markuus, and my dear N who I will always love with all my heart.

Money- a lot has been thrown away on copious drinking, nights out and shoes... but all in all I have some memories of happy times such as motor racing with N and many a post-working-week-debriefing drinks down the local.

My twenties- A heart felt goodbye to my twenties; bittersweet as I lay to rest many fun and happy memories of my youth interspersed with the anxiety, insecurity, angst and heartache that goes along with it.

Things I have gained:

New friends. 
New flat. 
My independence back. 
Strength and Tone from my gym workouts.
Perspective.
A whole new decade ahead of me as I entered my thirties.
New gig experiences- Deftones, Bastille and the amazing Nine Inch Nails... memories of the latter I will treasure forever. Two more ticks off on my "Bands to See Before I Die" list. 

A review of my 2013 Resolutions:

Resolution 1: Be more active.
Achieved. I'm still going to the gym about twice a week and generally feeling better for it; although I certainly notice the difference when I don't go.

Resolution 2: Be less angry.
Semi- Achieved. I'm not sure this has happened... if it has it's more by the ever-so-slightly decreased invasion of the Government impacting on my job and colleagues. I think this year has been more stressful than angry so I'm saying this is semi-achieved.

Resolution 3: Laugh more.
Achieved. I have certainly laughed a lot this year.  I have a graffiti'd piggy bank on my desk at work which says "Just Keep Larfin" thanks to my colleague Daz who decorated it for me and says I say the word Laugh posh.  He's from the Black Country.

Resolution 4: Be Inspired.
Semi- Achieved.  I've been to the cinema, seen films at home and been to gigs this year which have all been inspiring to me. However I need to get out more next year and see more places.  I've spend too much time in the office this year... I need inspiration from nature and new cities next year (money permitting).

Resolution 5: Be more creative.
Semi-Achieved. I failed to get my new tattoo thanks to money issues, however I have one planned for my birthday in 2014.  I've done more sculpture commissions this year and have two lined up for the beginning of next year.  To be continued. 

Resolution 6: Blog more.
Achieved. This has definitely been achieved.

Resolution 7: Feel settled.
Not achieved. Work in progress.  I think I know what I need to be happy- companionship.  At the moment I'm at a loss as to where to find this.


2014 Resolutions to be posted soon. 

Hurt.

 

You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way.

Came Back Haunted

And now the come down.

On wednesday morning I was sitting in Birmingham Airport awaiting my flight to Belfast to see Nine Inch Nails. It's hard to believe that it was a whole three days ago!

 

After checking into the hotel which was a stones throw from Chapter House Square where the gig took place, N and I went and got food in a nice little gastro-pub round the corner. We started queuing shortly after to ensure we got a good spot.  And I have to say I got THE BEST spot I have EVER EVER had at a gig.  Running down one side of the big courtyard where the crowd gathered, was a "VIP" area which was raised up about three feet. People had paid an extra tenner for the privilige but I would suggest it was debatable wether it was worth it.  Running along this was the normal security barriers which come with handy steps for security to step onto to lift people over.  This would become my position for the night.  I sat on the ledge for the first two bands, both of whom where better than anticipated- local bands Little Matador and And So I Watch You From Afar. I was particularly impressed by the latter who sounded like a more lively Maybeshewill, with tinges of Steve Vai.  I've yet to check out their albums, as I expect they may sound better live than on Cd. We managed to make an aquaintence of a strange character from Canada called Darren who flitted between seeming like a harmless, lonely drunk to being slightly dark and a bit mysterious.  However, when the music started, his attentions were quite rightly focussed on his idols.

 

It rained a bit, but fortunately I had my trusty cardigan with the goblin hood to keep the rain off, and so I took my position in anticipation of Nine Inch Nails coming on stage.  I could see the whole stage and was close enough to see the bands faces- including the face of the GENIUS Mr Reznor, the whole crowd in front, aside and to the back of me... it was immense.  And then it just all happened.  I was just elated and enthralled through out the whole set, taking photo's and videos without getting knocked about.  I just soaked every second of it up. 

Highlights for me were Copy of A which was their opening track- the energy from the stage and crowd was just epic; Closer and Hurt.  Hurt was just incredible- hearing the crowd singing along in the darkness... I felt quite emotional and just about managed to stop myself welling up like a total saddo.

The night was finished off with a NIN themed Guiness and a JD and Coke in the hotel before retiring to rest our weary heads and prepare for the post-gig come down.  Whilst I am THRILLED to have seen them, I am running out of "Bands to see before I die".  I only have one (kindof) left- A Perfect Circle/Puscifer and I have a feeling I will have to travel a little bit further afield to see one of those two as they rarely tour, let alone outside of America.

The day after the gig, we had a couple of hours to kill before our flight home so we took a look round the new Titanic museum.  Wierd building, but fairly decent inside, however in my opinion they should have made more of the tradgedy and focussed on the mass death a bit more, not in a morbid way you understand, but more to get an idea of the scale of the disaster.  Understandably, they focussed it on the building and construction, as the museum stands on the docks where the Titanic was built. I dunno- maybe I just prefer a bit more punch and drama in my museum excursions. Hehe.

Busy-ness.

Has it really been two weeks since I blogged? cripes.

It's been busy! Work is manic, with stress levels hitting new heights.  The good thing about the people I work with is that as stress levels rise, so does the sense of humour and mischievousness so we've had two weeks of intensely hard work flanked by points of hilarity, practical jokes and lots of laughs.  Too many laughs at points, with me getting told off for laughing too loud while a colleague was on the phone. 

I've been working hard at the gym and also went for a run with my chum H this week.  I was crap at it, having to run for short bursts and then walk in between.  Today, I've finally managed to do a set of six 8kg shoulder pressed weights which is a big achievement for me and a sure sign that my little spaghetti arms are getting much stronger.  I feel more toned and solid.

I've spent this weekend doing some sculpting, and I have to say despite the slow pace, I'm pretty pleased with the likeness I've achieved in the face of this commission.  It's been a really productive weekend- buzzing... and the best is yet to come.  I have a two day work week this week because....

... It's finally arrived.

This Wednesday, I will be watching Nine Inch Nails in an open air gig in Ireland.

Holy Fuck.

This is going to be... Epic.

(Can you fill the silence?)

 

Bastille 09.03.13

It's been a while since I walked through Digbeth; a place of potholed streets and shabby chic, where the indie scene breathes through vintage shops and traditional crumbly brick pubs.  It was here I joined a queue of inappropriately dresssed young people to see Bastille.  I'd like to point out that although I am close enough to my disappearing youth to remember being 16, I am now old enough to appreciate an adequate number of layers when it's freezing outside.  I don't, therefore, consider wearing a coat to a gig at which I have to queue outside for about 40minutes to be too much of a hardship even if I do have to carry it while I'm in there. 

Once in the warmth of The (HMV) Institute, I joined the small crowd gathering near the stage.  It was only when the first distinctly average, but not overly offensive support act started to play that I realised I was stuck standing behind the worlds tallest man.  By the time the second act had started- a carbon copy of Florence and The Machine- again, not rubbish but entirely forgettable because it had all been done before, I realised I was standing next to a woman whose posterior seemed to have a circumference of saturns rings. At one point, she started dancing and if I hadn't been wedged in, I'm pretty sure I'd have been bounced out of the venue and back to the Bullring. 

The Tall Giant man kindly moved aside and I squeezed in to see the stage for the first time for Bastille's hour long set.  I've been a fan of theirs since I heard Flaws just over a year ago on Alex Baker's Kerrang show.  I have him to thank for Maybshewill and Awolnation also.  I think I have all their music, two albums being released for free by the band despite the sound quality being poor.  I'm always appreciative of originality in music wether I like it or not, especially these days because it's so rare.  I remember being struck by Bastille because I couldn't lable them, I couldn't fit them to a genre, and still can't really.  Their love of rythmn really speaks to me and as such I've been a fan of theirs from the get go.  I had been worried that Bastille wouldn't live up to my expectations live since they rely on a lot of digital layers but my concerns were proved wrong immediately.  On the contrary, they sounded fantastic and didn't disappoint.  They played an absolutely blinding set and I was glad to have caught them at a time when they were still humbled and dumbfounded by their newfound fame and success.  They struck me as down to earth and genuine.  It was even nice to see Dan's amazingly upright hair gradually flatten throughout the night.  A truly great night... with each song played met with mass enthusiasm from a young crowd.  I was just really pleased for them and happy to see truly fresh, creativity in the heart of Birmingham. 

 

"It is not enough to be dumbstruck"

Take Me To The Edge.

Last night I finally got to experience one of my Christmas presents- tickets to see The Deftones in Birmingham.

 

Despite my cold and infected lungs, we weren't out in the cold too long queuing up for our balcony seats.  Annoyingly you can't join the O2 priority queue for balcony seats- it would see O2 only think you're worth prioritising if you're willing to stand up and at my old age of nearly-30, these days I opt for a safe corner room or seats instead of the mosh pit.  We had good seats directly facing the stage and the nice size of the O2 arena made it feel close yet a safe distance from the crowd. 

Not all that far away from us was sat a little old lady with white hair and glasses.  On noticing this lovely, open-minded old lady, I'd already used the words "youngsters", "coats" and "what language is he singing in?" for the support act, 27 year old nutbags Let Live, so I was feeling like a right granny.  And yet, sitting just down the aisle from us, was this wonderful lady.  I want to be like her when I'm her age.  I have no doubt she is the Gran of one of the support acts or something, but still, for her to be open-minded enough to even enter a venue like that is incredible. 

The gig itself was superb.  Highlights being, Change, Passenger and My Own Summer (obviously).  Looking down onto the crowd it's always hard not to miss the pit- each silhouetted little head halo'd by the stage lighting, arms raised, waves of movement as people got lost in the sounds and energy.  Still, I got to enjoy the music without overheating, losing anything, being paranoid about getting robbed and without any injuries. :)

I had one of those moments during Riviere... you know what I mean seasoned gig-goers... just one of those moments where you just feel... awe.  And memories.  And peace. And loads of emotions all at once... like everything is perfect within one song.  Like you're surrendering your soul to the music completely.  Words are never quite fitting for moments like those; it's almost impossible to describe.

There were some songs that I wished they'd played- Back to School, You've Seen The Butcher, Digital Bath, Knife Party.  The latter however, spark intense emotion in me on record let alone live. All in all though, an incredibly energetic setlist which packed a heavy punch.  Just AWESOME. 

Gigs and bits.

Another brilliant gig last Monday- Rise Against.

After having to join a MONSTER queue, we were plucked out by an O2 Angel who after a swift look at our phones, took us to the priority customer queue and we walked straight in! So there IS an advantage to being an o2 customer after 10 years!

The crowd wasn't quite as friendly as the Incubus crowd, but I expected from two very different bands. I did feel a bit old, and quickly realised that I was going to be much more comfortable watching this particular gig from a distance but all in all they lived up to my expectations. They even played Audience of One which is one of my favorites.

Tom Morrello was supporting and proved to be a fantastic warm up act. Great frontman- though I wasn't sure about all his music. Listenable but not as angsty as I thought it might be- particularly for the political-slant he seemed to take. I loved that he came on stage in his Guy-Fawkes-Occupy mask and tried to get the kids to consider politics, socialism and the Occupy movement. Awesome work Mr Morrello. Two thumbs up.

Suprisingly I think I enjoyed Incubus slightly more- and not just because of the incredibly, hot, sultry, half-naked man on the stage, but because I could connect more with the music, knew more words to sing along and wasn't distracted by having to protect my feet and arms from bruising and tissue damage.

I'm already on the look at for other gigs in December but haven't seen any that take my fancy yet. The Download 2012 headliners are being announced slowly but surely over the next few weeks- Metallica headlining, which I guessed months ago. I'm not suprised if it's going to have a very retro vibe with it being the 10th anniversary so I may be giving it a miss next year. There'd have to be some pretty amazing names up there like NIN or A Perfect Circle to get me to go. We'll see... but I'm not exactly going to be rushing out to get tickets yet.

I'm 80% done with Christmas shopping which isn't bad for mid November. Still a number of things to get, and relatively on budget so all going well there.

Quiet(ish) weekend ahead... a cosy night in with some good TV including Derren Brown.

Only you can bring the colour in...

Last night I went to see Incubus for the second time. The last time I saw them was lightyears ago (when I was still a student) and they were but tiny dots on a stage which felt like a mile away (thank you NIA seat allocation system). However, this time, at the Wolverhampton Civic, it was a far more intimate affair. Mmmm intimate affair with Brandon Boyd...

... Yeah the gig was awesome. Aside from the intense heat, something which I recalled as soon as I entered the building from my 15 year old self getting crushed amongst sweaty bodies at a Muse gig, it was a perfect gig with a perfect setlist. Brandon, despite some recent trampy photos, looked every bit the god-like genius that he is and after teasing the crowd for an hour and a half finally succumbed to the heat and removed his shirt. Happy happy times.

I have another gig Monday which I can abso-bloomin-lutely not wait for: RISE AGAINST. I canNOT wait. What's more... I booked today, Monday and Tuesday off work so that work doesn't detract from the awesome-ness of these two gigs.

My current commuter journey is being enriched by the beautiful new Puscifer album- Conditions of My Parole, which just sounds incredible. It's arrival on my walkman has been perfectly timed with the evenings drawing in. I'm getting lost in the album every night on the way home from work- it's dark, moodiness echoed in the light falling throughout my hour journey home. I leave work in full light, and get home in relative dark, car headlights bouncing off the pavements and twinkling in a silent stream as Puscifer reverberates round my skull.

I am loving it.

Download-ed.

Oh. My. God.

I survived... just about. Only mud was on the last day... thankfully. My trusty Wedge Wellies were a god send. In fact, on Sunday, the ONLY parts of me that weren't soaked to the bone and freezing cold were my feet!

Thursday we spent all day trudging round to find a good pitch. We ended up in the Brown campsite which suited us just fine though it was probably the furthest away from pretty much everything! I think we just ate, drank and had a poke about in The Village.

Friday was gloriously sunny to start with and we watched CKY kick off precedings who would have been alot more entertaining if the lead guitarist wasn't such an ignorant little shit. We were pretty close to the front for the first few acts who were Puddle of Mudd who put in an average performance, Duff McDuffs Duff band who I most certainly did NOT enjoy- far too much American tripe, and then we got to the good stuff with a blinding set from Black Stone Cherry. I think at this point, I was removed from the Main Stage thanks to being outvoted by my Download companions, and had to watch Children of Bo(r)dom on the second stage who were absolutely crap, but we were back at the main stage to see Alterbridge who were far far better than I thought they'd be.

Rain threatened to interrupt us enjoying Korn on the second stage- but they were awesome. It's a wonder I was able to actually see anything due to the copious amounts of tobacco and other substances being smoked in the audience. It would seem Korn fans like their dangerous chemicals. I was hoping for a rendition of Word Up! but even though it didn't happen I wasn't disappointed- they were absolutely brilliant and we even got a blast of Bagpipes from Jonathon Davis! Genius! To finish off the day, now in heavier rain, we went to see the cheese-meisters Deff Leppard. I think the less said about this the better... we left half way through and headed back on the 30 minute walk back to camp.

Saturday saw the Sun back again in the morning. Myself and my fellow Downbloaders were already sporting various degrees of sunburn at this stage and wierdly I woke up with a swollen forehead. It didn't look too red, but it was swollen up so I couldn't frown or raise my eyebrows- not particularly a problem while at Download! I can only assume this happened while we were trying to find a pitch on Thursday as I'd slathered myself in factor 50 no less the previous day! Still, we ate as much food as we could and headed to the Arena for our second day of rock/metal. I was determined to grab and maintain hold on a decent place near(ish) the front of the main stage on Saturday because System of a Down were headlining in the evening. So, we pretty much remained rooted to the spot for The Devil Wears Prada (not good), All That Remains (this band remains a mystery since I cannot remember ANY of the set... I can only vaguely recognise the band... I have no idea to this day where my head was at while this band were playing!), Escape the Fate (more un-memorable stuff), Skindred who were one of the highlights of my weekend- despite being nearly crushed they absolutely SMASHED it. They were awesome. These were followed by The Hollywood Undead who I'm glad I missed by going to get a much needed burger. We were back in position, thanks to a bit of tag-team-work with my fellow Downloaders, and here we watched Down who were average- possibly spoilt by another utter cock of a frontman. I was pretty stoked and excited about seeing Skunk Anansie, and Skin definitely wins for outfit of the weekend (!) ... but it was spoilt by much of the crowd gathering for Avenged Sevenfold- most of whom were complete intolerant bastards and didn't give Skin and her crew the audience they deserved. She kept going, like a trooper... and did a spot of crowd walking (i.e walking ON the crowd which was brave/stupud I'm not sure which!). They were really on form, but the setlist wasn't what it could have been and a minority of the audience really spoilt it for me by treating them like shit. To those few fans who felt the need to be so disgusting and pathetic while waiting a mere hour for another average band- grow the fuck up you complete moronic bastards.

... ahem... anyway where were we... yeah following Skunk Anansie, was Avenged Sevenfold who were, again, better than I had expected as I'm not a huge fan of their stuff. They had a massive following... but I dunno- I just can't shake the feeling that their whole ethos is so old and unoriginal, a little bit 80's. Is it really so hard to be inventive these days?! ... still, I endured for the sake of System of a Down. There was a bit of a wait, dodging bottles of piss/beer and being entertained by a couple of ballsy lighting riggers. It was so worth the wait. So worth the bottle dodging, the crushing (though I was mostly protecting and sheltered from this by N!), the sunburn, the rain. People were being lifted out of the crowd for being crushed or the circle pits expanding too much... but my god... it was worth waiting for... System were just blinding. I sang/shouted until my voice went croaky and I just didn't want it to end. Incredible.

Following from Saturdays high... Sunday came around- our last day. We ate a bit of breakfast trying to use up the last bits of our food and booze before home the following day. Yes- we did have booze for breakfast. It started raining pretty soon after... we weren't in any rush until a bit later on in the day so we played a game of band A-Z, shouting to each other from our tents as we all sheltered from the pouring rain. We sheltered until about mid day where we braved it to go and see Karma to Burn on the second stage- who oddly, weren't there and were replaced with Hyro Da Hero. By this point, we'd discovered the driving rain was also accompanied by a strong and bloody freezing wind... neither of which showed any signs of letting up. This is where things took a turn for the worse. My trusty Mack in a Pack who has accompanied me on many many journeys for the last 10 years... decided to commit suicide on my body. It gave up the ghost- was no longer waterproof. It soaked through my not-so-waterproof, and consequently my hoody, my cardy-jacket layer, my thin hoody, and my vest top... to my now shivering wreck of a body. I managed to endure a wierd Norweigen metal band whose name escapes me and the freakin wierdness of GWAR (which was like world of warcraft meets red dwarf on viagra and speed)... before realising that I really needed to get warm and dry soon as. I headed back to camp... and it was a good hour or two before I felt warm again. I had intended to go back for Buckcherry, Disturbed and Bullet for My Valentine, finishing with Frank Turner on the Pepsi Max stage... but it became apparant that ALL my warm layers I'd been wearing were soaked through and that I had nothing dry or warm to wear. The rain was heavier than ever, the wind was even colder if it was possible and I pretty much had to cut my losses and stay put in my tent, miserably listening to Disturbed and Bullet from afar. I was gutted... but I guess no band is worth getting sick for. Next year, I will definitely be taking a far more substantial rain coat.

And that concluded Download. The long trudge back to the car carrying all our stuff, in the masses of mud from the previous day felt like some sort of apocalyptic mass exodus of weary, sunburnt, slightly damp, achey broken people burdened with too much luggage and inappropriate footwear. Still... a last southern comfort and coke accompanied by an apple, was had in celebration on reaching the car... and our trip ended.